Circle : What is it?

Why we all need a space to speak without being fixed

A few years ago I was going through one of the hardest periods of my life. My teenage daughter was struggling, and so was I. I won't go into the details — they're not mine alone to share - but anyone who has watched their child go through a difficult time will know the particular exhaustion of it. The worry that sits with you through the night. The not knowing what to do.

What I didn't expect was how lonely it would feel to talk about it.

I had people around me. Good people, people who loved me. But every time I tried to speak about what we were going through, the responses came quickly. Have you tried this? You should speak to someone about that. I'm sure it'll be fine. All well meaning. All completely missing what I actually needed.

I stopped talking about it. I became less social, more withdrawn. Without realising it, I had started to disappear a little.

Then I went to my first women's circle.

Nobody tried to fix me. Nobody jumped in with advice or reframed what I was saying or moved me along. I spoke, and I was heard. That was it. And something in me that had been very tightly wound began, quietly, to loosen.

I hadn't realised how much I needed that until I finally had it.

What actually happens in circle

Stepping into a circle is like stepping into a sacred space - for you, and for every woman in the room. I often describe it as a mini retreat, a micro dose of something your soul has been quietly asking for.

There's usually a theme, sometimes some sound, occasionally cacao in ceremony, we may pull an Oracle card. But at its heart it's simply a place to land. To arrive. To take up space without apologising for it.

One of the most quietly powerful things that happens in circle is the mirror effect. You hear another woman say something and you think — I feel that too. I didn't even know I felt that until she said it out loud. That recognition, that sense of being seen in someone else's words, is where a lot of the Integration happens. Gently, without you even noticing.

And the science backs it up - being truly heard, without judgement or agenda, genuinely regulates the nervous system. It's not just good for the soul. It's good for the body.

You don't need fixing

This is what circles are for. You, showing up exactly as you are, You are not broken. You don't come to circle to be fixed or advised or analysed. You come to be yourself, fully, in a confidential space with like minded women who get it.

You leave feeling connected. Seen. Like you've remembered something about yourself you'd forgotten.

That's what sisterhood does. That's what circle is for.

If this speaks to you, I'd love you to join me. My Women's Circle meets monthly online, with in person gatherings here on the Costa Brava coming later this year. Just reply or get in touch - I'd love to have you.

Liv